Brand Tone

Witty, Humorous, and Irreverent

Brand Values

• •Humor and Joy
• •Uniqueness and Individuality
• •Curation and Discovery
• •Novelty

Best Practices

• •Embrace the Irony: Always lean into the "useless" aspect of the brand name with a wink. Acknowledge that the products are not life-essentials but are essential for a good laugh.
• •Speak Like a Friend, Not a Corporation: Use conversational and relatable language. Ask questions, use humor, and avoid overly formal or technical jargon. The goal is to build a community, not just a customer base.
• •Focus on the "Why," Not Just the "What": The copy should sell the experience—the laugh, the conversation, the surprise—not just the product's features. Instead of saying "Durable plastic material," say "Built to withstand years of questionable decisions."
• •Keep it Punchy and Scannable: Especially on social media, use short sentences, bullet points (or emojis as bullet points), and witty one-liners. Get to the joke or the point quickly to capture attention.
• •Be Clever, Not Crass: The humor should be witty and universally amusing. Avoid controversial or offensive topics to maintain a lighthearted and inclusive brand image. The goal is to be funny and irreverent, not alienating.

Social Perception

The public perceives UselessTreasures as a fun, niche online store perfect for finding unique gifts. The brand name is seen as clever and memorable, accurately reflecting the playful nature of its product catalog. Customers are not just buying a product; they are buying a story, a laugh, or a future inside joke. The brand is considered a go-to destination for white elephant gifts, birthday presents for friends with a good sense of humor, and personal gadgets that add a bit of fun to the mundane.

Copy Examples

• •Lazy has been upgraded to legendary. This mug stirs itself so you can focus on more important things, like thinking about what you'll have for lunch. Tag a friend who needs this level of efficiency.
• •Your Home is Too Normal. Let's fix that. Our collection of home decor is scientifically proven* to make guests say, 'Where did you get that?!' Shop now and give your home the personality it deserves. (*Not scientifically proven, but highly likely).
• •Tiny Hands - For Big Laughs. Everything is better with tiny hands. Petting your dog? Better. Eating popcorn? Better. High-fiving a stranger? Definitely better (and less weird). These photorealistic mini-hands are the useless accessory you absolutely need for important business meetings, awkward first dates, and boring family dinners. You're welcome.
• •New Weird Stuff Has Arrived. Your Impulse Control Is In Danger.
• •Gifts That Are Perfectly Useless & Absolutely Unforgettable. Explore our treasure trove of things you don't need but will definitely want.